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Truth be told, I get sad.

I am devastated that we lost our last location and still do not know why. I miss people gathered in our huge, unexpected space laughing and eating and drinking.

I miss feeling like space was limitless and being only limited my own creativity. Now I feel like my creativity is being limited by our space.

I am hurt. I feel like I was stabbed in the heart and punched in the gut and never saw it coming. It feels like the wind was taken out of my sails, torn and I nearly hung by the fabric.

It’s so hard to continue to always be the positive, glass half full, it’s all going to work out face. Even though it looks easy doesn’t mean it actually is. 

Sometimes people can be so incredibly mean. Yelp, Facebook, Instagram, Square feedback, Google my Business- yes I read and respond to them all. Even though there are 50 supporters to every one attacker, those words still hurt; and they’re the ones repeating in your mind. It’s as if people don’t realize on the other side of their expectations is a person who has poured their entire self into the thing they want to tear down. Constructive feedback is always welcome and appreciated, but goodness people forget that we are all humans.

Owning a business can make you feel both completely isolated and socially burnt out all at the same time.

I feel immense stress. Is something going to go wrong, will we pass an inspection, is the staff taken care of, is my family taken care of, did I file all of the paperwork, is everything paid, am I expecting too much, am I delegating enough. It’s waiting until I cannot move my neck to get to the chiropractor and biting my nails until they bleed to keep it all internalized.

I consistently forget everything. Like right now, we are out of paper towels and just opened the last pack of toilet paper at home, and the fridge is loaded to the point that it won’t stay shut with stuff that needs to be thrown out.

Oh and let’s not forget the guilt. Feeling like I am not living up to promises, aren’t doing enough to show the people I love that I think about them, like I’m always missing something. Guilt that I am not a good enough mom, friend and definitely not a good enough wife.

I know God gives mercy so freely, so today I am sad and praying for a little extra grace to get back out of the funk. Just wanted to share incase sometimes you get sad too.

9 thoughts on “Truth be told, I get sad.”

  1. We’ll Linds, I think you’re doing a great job, just as you always have at everything you tackle. It takes time for everything to fall into place. There are things you have no control over. Just realized you’re trying and at the end of the day, you know “ You” did your best! Keep your chin up! There are great things to come in life that you haven’t even experienced yet! X0X0🥰

      1. I’m sorry you are feeling this way. It seems like the pressure right now is worse than it’s ever been. I’m praying that the pressure lets up and that your business begins to feel like home soon.

  2. I relate to your words more than I realized, thank you for sharing. You are not alone in these feelings, it is so unbelievably hard to do what we do. I often reflect on my “why” and never read yelp. I work hard for the people that love & appreciate us, the ones that see our passion and the community that supports our dreams. I was so bummed to hear that you lost your lease, I could imagine how awful you felt and the immense heartache. I pray that many blessings will find you and that you’ll prosper through this awful time. Keep your head up, stay focused on your passion & what brings you joy, hug your family often and have faith that everything will be alright. Sometimes we just need a second to be sad and feel all the feels and that’s ok! Sending you big hugs and as a fellow business owner/new friend, I am here for you!
    Xoxo- Bree

    1. Sometimes I write things to get them out of me and it feels strange to share them. But then I read responses of how people cannot to how I’m feeling and realize the only way for us to fully connect as humans is to be vulnerable for each other sometimes.

  3. Every single day it takes an amazing amount of grace to get up and do it all over again. I wish we could all remember to live by these simple rules, respect one another, and remember not to judge, for we can never truly understand what it is to walk in another’s shoes. And for those of us who are “strong”, that never means we don’t suffer, hurt, feel, struggle. We do, but we pick ourselves up and keep going. Having a moment of weakness sometimes is not an option, and so we hide those moments, cry in the bathroom. And when we’re done, put on a brave face and go back out to finish what we started. Oh, and never forget, bubbles make everything better. Love you my friend.

  4. Being a business owner, you literally do everything. You are the heart and soul of the company, the manager, the idea make-it-happener, the HR department, customer service, PR, marketing, payroll, accountant, etc. You don’t get the luxury of someone subbing you out for the day, you don’t get to be the one who vents to HR about the asshole who keeps triggering you. And, you always get critiqued and critisized, even when you’re giving it your all and doing so many amazing things.

    I feel you. I feel this. But, with all of the downs and lows, there are many highs and things to be proud of. I hope you can find that light and inner spark. And, give yourself time to take care of yourself and love yourself. You’ve done some AMAZING things. And you will get through this. This too shall pass. You got this, Lindsey.

    Routine, rythym, sitting down to organize, time to myself, and words of validation and love from those closest to me really help get me through my funks. From my heart to yours, sending you lots of love. Thanks for your honesty and sharing this.

  5. You are incredible. Thank you for being real!!!! I feel for you!!!! Small business is no joke, the amount of duties to keep up with is unexplainable. Love you!!!

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